Since the last update, talk about keeping good habits. It's tough I guess. Maybe if I wasn't such a gamer or talking on AIM all day and instead, reading, writing, etc. I'd probably be a lot more different. I would like to do that, anyways. Quitting video gaming is tough since I've been doing it for like, 5 years. Plus, there's more great games coming out that need to be played and won, by me of course. The only reason I like games so much probably has to do with how good I am at it and how long I've been doing it. It provides immediate pleasure doing whatever it is in a game. It's 6:47 right now so I'm deciding to go ahead and read some things and learn from like 7-8. Tomorrow should be fun. I don't know what we're going to do, but being with my cousins and those other people is fun. I look at these books on my drawer just sitting there, begging to be read. I never get around to doing it. I mean, I workout after school and have pretty good nutrition. Why can't I spend 20 minutes on a book? Oh, my mind probably ignores the fact that it's 20 minutes. It thinks it's going to be like hours of boredom, but 20 minutes is all I need to get a book done sooner or later.
I'm going to read this AP Computer Science book I've got here for 20 minutes, Fahrenheit 451 for 20 minutes, and Life of Pi as well. One hour, three books, sooner or later they'll be done and not just be part of my book collection but a part of me.
I'm off to the races.
Thursday, January 27, 2005
Wednesday, January 19, 2005
"This life is too much for some people."
I was just looking around in My Documents and randomly found this piece of writing about suicide. It's really interesting. I'm pretty sure I snagged it from the web somewhere, but I forgot where. Check it out and show it to anyone who may be feeling that way:
"Ah, yes. So once again, we arrive at the topic that our lives attempt to avoid, yet seemingly revolve around: Death. One could speak for hours upon hours about this topic, the greatest unknown that is known to man. Where do we end up? How does it feel? What is its meaning? There are many questions, mostly unanswerable... but when it deals with the living soul, and its choice for death, that, is another story.
My friends, I speak of suicide. As one author put it, suicide is merely a way to end the insurmountable pain. The way we should think is that pain is overwhelming, yes, but not unconquerable. Why surrender the most valuable thing that you have been given, whether by a god or your parents? Either way, it is a priceless gift, and should not be surrendered because of a seemingly limitless amount of pain, which, I remind you, results from this great gift.
"How might you fight it?" a desperate one may ask. I tell you now, that life is not the only gift that has been given to you, nor is it the strongest. The will to live, now that is the strongest power that has been handed to you. Your mind, your soul, your desires, your heart, everything revolves around the power of will that has been given to you. Solidify it, and stand. You must endure the pain, endure the pressure, endure the hardship. Pain and pleasure are tied together in this world of life; perhaps we may truly understand this as we die and pass on.
But meanwhile, as we are still alive, take the hand of a friend, and take comfort in the energy that flows from his/her heart to yours. Stand tall with this buddy of yours, fight off the pain. Find pleasure and peace. Rest assured, you are not friendless. When you think you are alone, you are doubting the very nature of man. Cry out for help, for mercy, for repreive; I assure you, some stranger will answer your call.
And in that moment, they are no longer a stranger...
The human will is the sword that cannot be broken; the human friendship is the shield that cannot be shattered."
"Ah, yes. So once again, we arrive at the topic that our lives attempt to avoid, yet seemingly revolve around: Death. One could speak for hours upon hours about this topic, the greatest unknown that is known to man. Where do we end up? How does it feel? What is its meaning? There are many questions, mostly unanswerable... but when it deals with the living soul, and its choice for death, that, is another story.
My friends, I speak of suicide. As one author put it, suicide is merely a way to end the insurmountable pain. The way we should think is that pain is overwhelming, yes, but not unconquerable. Why surrender the most valuable thing that you have been given, whether by a god or your parents? Either way, it is a priceless gift, and should not be surrendered because of a seemingly limitless amount of pain, which, I remind you, results from this great gift.
"How might you fight it?" a desperate one may ask. I tell you now, that life is not the only gift that has been given to you, nor is it the strongest. The will to live, now that is the strongest power that has been handed to you. Your mind, your soul, your desires, your heart, everything revolves around the power of will that has been given to you. Solidify it, and stand. You must endure the pain, endure the pressure, endure the hardship. Pain and pleasure are tied together in this world of life; perhaps we may truly understand this as we die and pass on.
But meanwhile, as we are still alive, take the hand of a friend, and take comfort in the energy that flows from his/her heart to yours. Stand tall with this buddy of yours, fight off the pain. Find pleasure and peace. Rest assured, you are not friendless. When you think you are alone, you are doubting the very nature of man. Cry out for help, for mercy, for repreive; I assure you, some stranger will answer your call.
And in that moment, they are no longer a stranger...
The human will is the sword that cannot be broken; the human friendship is the shield that cannot be shattered."
Tuesday, January 18, 2005
Laziness and me.
It's been a while yet again. I don't think it's laziness that prevents me from writing, but just not forming a good habit to do so. That's one of my problems :|. Nothing to do about it except stop talking about doing it and finish it. Laziness really, sucks. My brain is weirder than it used to be, I study as much as I used to do last year. When you think about it, there's no point to laziness. It's stupid, but interestingly increasing among the population. I'll bet you a lot of people think twice before doing things like: Is it worth walking 10 feet to my table to pick up a book and read? Most people would say no. I'd really like to do things like find a bunch of books to read and learn from. Actually, I've been trying for a while. The only thing I managed to read was On the Duty of Civil Disobedience by Henry David Thoreau. The language on that was pretty tough, you can say that. It really doesn't matter as long as I get the idea. I just really want to read a lot more, educate myself, or something.
This world is losing many scholars, and thanks to the laziness, less people want to be scholars. This will create a huge increase in ignorance and personally, that really sucks. The last thing I'd want being a muslim is to be called an Arab, towel-head, or anything dumb just because of what I believe in, not where I'm from. You can see it in my face, honestly, where does that come from? Ignorance, no respect, not caring at all, etc. I mean in my position I should just say I'm an Albanian Catholic or something to fit in, but that's not the truth. Some people need to understand, but they won't and don't want to. Even I am not very sure about things too like, my religion. Sometimes people ask me questions and I don't have the answer. I'd like to come up and shrewdly respond in some way or just plainly know the answer. A lot of bad writing definitely has come from the use of the internet. That's the truth, no average kid writes to other friends in IM's and things in proper English. They think since it's not a school, they can do what they like. That's true, but it would be a lot better for yourself and others, me included, to write properly.
These idea's I've written can sure be used by anyone else for their own writing if they wish, nothing is copywritten, as long as you mention my name so I feel special.
Today I completed my math and history exams. Not bad. I have to study for Chemistry and the rest so I'll hopefully write something tomorrow or definitely by Thursday. Peaceeee out.
This world is losing many scholars, and thanks to the laziness, less people want to be scholars. This will create a huge increase in ignorance and personally, that really sucks. The last thing I'd want being a muslim is to be called an Arab, towel-head, or anything dumb just because of what I believe in, not where I'm from. You can see it in my face, honestly, where does that come from? Ignorance, no respect, not caring at all, etc. I mean in my position I should just say I'm an Albanian Catholic or something to fit in, but that's not the truth. Some people need to understand, but they won't and don't want to. Even I am not very sure about things too like, my religion. Sometimes people ask me questions and I don't have the answer. I'd like to come up and shrewdly respond in some way or just plainly know the answer. A lot of bad writing definitely has come from the use of the internet. That's the truth, no average kid writes to other friends in IM's and things in proper English. They think since it's not a school, they can do what they like. That's true, but it would be a lot better for yourself and others, me included, to write properly.
These idea's I've written can sure be used by anyone else for their own writing if they wish, nothing is copywritten, as long as you mention my name so I feel special.
Today I completed my math and history exams. Not bad. I have to study for Chemistry and the rest so I'll hopefully write something tomorrow or definitely by Thursday. Peaceeee out.