Hiatus

Hey, I'm back after nine days... I won't be back until after my birthday though. No, I'm not going anywhere. I just have a lot to study for: SAT's, AP's, and my own enrichment. It's like all of these things are passing by so quickly. The school year just flew by and is still redlining. So, this is just a notice for anyone who reads or wants to read more, I doubt there are.
I don't know if I mentioned this in the post before, but I'm going to try to write my own book. You're probably like WOW!, but we'll see. Most of this information will come from a few websites I know and I'll try writing most of it myself which will be a challenge. I don't mind, this isn't going to be a quick project. I want this to take time so I can carve a masterpiece.
Oh also, I'm currently reading Dante Alighieri's Divine Comedy. Great book so far I'll be on the sixth Cantos in a few minutes. Afterwards, I have my own to-read list which include these other books: Virgil's Aenied, Geoffry Chauncer's The Canterbury Tales, and to finish up Johann Wolfgang von Goethe's Faust. After I'm done reading those--It'll be a while--I'll find more great books to read. The internet is an amazing universe. There's so much to learn it's amazing.
My favorite informational/encylopedical website has to be Wikipedia. Their whole philosophy is great. I love how there's open source editing on their files, even if there are a few "trolls" who try to screw things up. One of their most potent idea's may be the Wikiversity, where it's bascially an e-college. It's a great idea, but it's not really a large project yet. We need more credible professors from other universities to help out, which I doubt would happen. Either way, it's a great idea, kid's can learn what they want without having to really pay the 40 grand a year for it. Maybe it doesn't even have to be for college, there's a high school course too for kids who want to learn things themselves but can't.
Ok well, it's Friday and I've got an exact week until my AP and SAT exams. This is going to be tough, I wan't to try to "asian" the tests but that may be bad as well. My grades are alright but if they see a Great SAT score they'll think, "This kid is probably lazy, we don't want him." I need some congruity between my grade point average and my SAT score, despite this, I still want my SAT scores to be great.
Another quote,
Education: that which reveals to the wise, and conceals from the stupid, the vast limits of their knowledge.
-Mark Twain

Philosophy

A philosopher is a person devoted to studying and producing results in philosophy. The word, "philosopher," literally means "lover of wisdom." en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Philosopher

So I guess you could consider me a philosopher. I do in fact, love wisdom. I can't imagine life without knowing what I do now. Although what I know is feeble in comparison with others. All I have really is understanding in science and religion. I feel like my life is complete; that what I have is what others spend their life searching for. With this profound knowledge it's hard to imagine that others haven't been enlightened too. It's weird as well, other philosophers today are not as famous as the ones from the past. We know so much more today it's like this knowledge is worthless, the prior authors have answered our questions. In a way it's like, the earlybird gets the worm, except we can't really choose to be early or late. They're the lucky one's who were made before and are much more well known becuase they figured it out first. Now there's technology like computers that we have much more to research but besdies that all we have to do is live our lives and wait until it's all over. I foresee a period of enormous happiness, where society decays and everyone is glad. Something big will happen, after much ignorance and excessive bloodshed which is currently occurring in this world. When will this happiness take place? That's not for me to know, even being the "wisdom lover" that I am. I just hope somewhere along the line I see from here or above a great echoing, "I told you so!" Today life is more precious since it's being more easily taken away with the exponential developments of technology. With a pull to a semi circular trigger, being liquidated by nuclear bomb, or any of the other seemingly infinite ways to Hell's "nirvana". Being born in the first place is tough as well. We're born from a competition with millions of other competitors, to be chosen to live and taking that gift for granted is unappreciative. An interesting thought: Perhaps no matter which one wins, the same soul is given to it. That would make sense in some ways as well as an uplifting thought. (If you don't know what I'm talking about "which one wins" think about Biology and then a male's reproductive system.)

Today I've been reading a lot and felt really inspired, it was an interesting and seemingly rare moment for me. So I decided to write although, not about this. I've been reading about the alleged existence of a "gay gene" which has prompted me to think deeply about it, it will probably be the topic of my next post. The reason is because too many people including kids in my school believe that there is a gene and that it's more acceptable nowadays. They are people too, you don't just treat them like outcasts and label them. I'll have more info about the issue next, my idea's are just waiting to come out.

This quote seems to back up my first paragraph about philosophers best,
All intelligent thoughts have already been thought; what is necessary is only to try to think them again.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe(This guy rules)

Depression

"Alas! My ecstasy is when I pick the ripe fruit from the tree of destiny and cherish it. For when nothing new happens and all is perfect, another Apple is bitten. Our imperfections are ironically... perfect. So embrace each pear, apple, orange, and other variety rather than scorn them. " - I wrote something myself this time.

Depression is so... dumb. There's no benefit to it, except for some fruity bands dressed in black singing about how "sad" they are and how much money they get from sad pizza faced teenagers. If you keep talking about how sad you are it will only get worse, you're not saving yourself. There are things you can do though, there's always religion whatever it may be as long it's one of the "big three." I don't know about the other smaller ones but as long as you believe in one God, that's enough. If your like me who wanted the truth rather than just faith to prove it, I'll help. I've done enough work to figure all of this stuff out and asked a scholar any questions I had and it all fit. After figuring this stuff out, I can't understand how I wanted to kill myself over something as dumb as looks. My idea of myself changed as well, I just hated myself enough back then to think I was ugly and worthless. I guess I'm not. I hope to help someone who was in my position that would probably make me a lot happier and feel like my life is complete. It's weird, I just want to do my part too... But it's hard when so many are led the wrong way. I know there's no way to change everyone, so to help a few people and have them thank me would be more than enough for me.

Hmm, anyways... Love is probably the number one cause to depression. Romanticism is a tool used by the devil to trick people into killing themselves for reasons like, "If I can't have you I can't live." Love was made by God to love Him first, now that's something you probably haven't though of, right? "Love has been given to humanity so that it may be shown foremost towards God, who created us from nothing, who provides for us, gives us every blessing, and who promised us an eternal life filled with happiness. Also, love is an emotion that must be directed towards those who love God and whom God loves, that is, to believers. A person is loved for his closeness to God, his fear of God, and his care to protect His prerogatives. All these forms of love are directed toward God, and toward those objects in which His attributes are manifested. In fact, for a believer to feel love for the enemies of God and His religion is forbidden in the Qu'ran."

He also doesn't want you to hurt yourself and thinking your closer to him by doing that. "For example, there are Christians who think they are drawing closer to Jesus by having themselves crucified. In certain Oriental religions, such as Buddhism, starving oneself, sleeping in an uncomfortable place, and other forms of "self immolation," are supposed to make one holy. The problem is that there is no such idea that in the Qu'ran that a person should cause himself pain, "God does not wrong people in any way; rather it is people who wrong themselves." (Qur'an, 10:44) "

"It is interesting that people, whom Satan has misled through sentimentalism, seem to be drawn to ill feelings such as pessimism, hopelessness, sorrow, grief, and depression. Instead of living with the peace of mind resulting from putting one's trust in God, people commit themselves into continual sorrow." So depression is just stupid, it's a tool and nothing more.

That's my post about depression and my little religion course interweaved. I hope you had fun reading it because you probably didn't. Here's a little passage from Johann Wolfgang von Goethe's Faust. Mephistopheles plays the devil and is talking to God in this scene:

Mephistopheles

Since, O Lord, you near me once again,

To ask how all below is doing now,

And usually receive me without pain,

You see me too among the vile crowd.

Forgive me: I can’t speak in noble style,

And since I’m still reviled by this whole crew,

My pathos would be sure to make you smile,

If you had not renounced all laughter too.

You’ll get no word of suns and worlds from me.

How men torment themselves is all I see.

The little god of Earth sticks to the same old way,

And is as strange as on that very first day.

He might appreciate life a little more: he might,

If you hadn’t lent him a gleam of Heavenly light:

He calls it Reason, but only uses it

To be more a beast than any beast as yet.

He seems to me, saving Your Grace,

Like a long-legged grasshopper: through space

He’s always flying: he flies and then he springs,

And in the grass the same old song he sings.

If he’d just lie there in the grass it wouldn’t hurt!

But he buries his nose in every piece of dirt.

I like how he's a bit comedic as well as truthful... I'm done writing.

Focus

I'm going to start reading tomorrow as soon as I wake up. As much as possible before the day's strawberry hued end. I'll end up reading three books as I progress: Goethe's Faust, Dante's The Divine Comedy, and Chauncer's The Canterbury Tales. They're all long as hell but I really want to finish them all, even if I have to read for the SAT's. Damn, the SAT's are such a waste of time. After reading these three books I'll look for more, maybe look into some Neitzsche stuff just because I've heard so much about him. This is what vacations are for anyways, right? Reading, haha. Although reading off of the computer screen is different than reading a book. To me its gleam distracts me and gives me an unexplainable urge to play games or listen to music. I'll try to make it seem like a school day, that might work. Wake up and start reading at about 7 AM. I hope there are some Red Bull's to help me concentrate, they really help. I'm sure you're like Wtf? Who's Johann Wolfgang von Goethe or Geoffry Chauncer? I was just looking around at some college's academic courses for an English major(not that I want to major in it) and saw Chauncer and John Milton's name in there. So from there I found out some other things and a few hours later here I am writing to you. Here are some aphorisms from Neitzsche "What is Genius? -To aspire to a lofty aim and to will the means to that aim." ; "Friendship and Marriage. - The best friend will probably get the best wife, because a good marriage is based on talent for friendship." ; "Help yourself, then everyone will help you. Principle of neighbor-love." ; "End and goal. - Not every end is the goal. The end of a melody is not its goal; and yet as long as the melody has not reached its end, it also hasn't reached its goal. A parable."

I'm Off.

Answers

Hmm, I'm trying to think of something to write about once again. It's feels like I've written all that I want, but that's not what I want. The weekend was fun, this coming up week is fun, life is fun. I don't know. It's like I've got nothing to ask myself because everything has been answered... Well let me start somewhere by showing you this link, http://www.oldamericancentury.org/14pts.htm . It shows 14 different points of how America is becoming fascist. The only one I could really disagree on would be on rampant sexism, I think #9... Looking back into my other blogs I gave myself some idea's to write about. Like, The importance of reading, studying, and habits or How to develop a genius child. Disadvantages, etc. I think I'll just frag two with one rail(If you don't play Quake 3 you probably don't get it.)

Reading is the most fundamental, important thing you can do. Think about it, if you couldn't read how different would your life be? What would you know? Basically nothing besides how-to labor and simple things like that. For me, I can't stand not knowing something. School curbs my curiosity, so I read and wonder. To wonder is to begin to understand and I love to undertake a new journey as much as possible before the days end. Studying is very important as well, without it I probably wouldn't know as much things that I've taught myself throughout the year. Having good habits for learning is one way to ensure it. Coming home from school and taking 2 hours to do your homework is good, but taking the rest of the time after that to learn something extracurricular is the best way. With some guidance and discipline that would be a beneficial thing to do for your kids. They'd thank you later for that no matter how much they complain then. Just make sure you teach them about religion, it will answer most of the questions that others have spent their lives figuring out or others who spent a few seconds with a gun and a finger on the trigger. There's no such thing as dumb questions just dumb answers. When you reach some point of above-average potency you'll see respect. What is life without being able to read?

How to develop a genius, a question wondered by many and is painstakingly obvious. Do it yourself. If you want your kid to read, help them find it within themselves. After that don't just leave it up to the schools, teach them as much as you can everyday. That's why homeschooled kids seem to be smarter than average Americans. Go ahead and teach your kid how to do Math when he's not even in school, you'll be surprised. Spending time with your kid is very important, they'll feel better and so will you. Even if it's hard to, make your cherished time as productive and effective as possible. There's nothing that would shock teachers more than seeing how some student is doing algebra while the others are still adding. I mean think about it, it's obvious. The only problem with having a smart kid is that they'd be made fun of by some insecure kid. Well, just try to have him do pushups everyday and get him stronger. No weights until about sophomore year in high school. Running around, eating healthy, and pushups is just as effective. If your kid is smart and strong, I don't know what to say. He'll probably very envied, but it's not that you want them to have it. It's just a repercussion of habits and parental intervention.

Whatever the case, it's up to you. "The important thing is not to stop questioning.",
"Try not to become a man of success, but rather try to become a man of value." Einstein
On top of it all, if your having trouble helping someone learn try remembering what it was like to not know rather than make fun of.
"Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could; some blunders and absurdities have crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; you shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense." Ralph Waldo Emerson

April 7

Apparently my English isn't great according to the kids in my computer science class. They edited my letter to the principal and yeah it's true, the english is pretty damn bad. That explains my grades in the classes over the years, I read and things sure but never managed to study grammar. So I'll be doing it on my own, the teachers in our school won't waste their time teaching a junior things like that. Instead, they make fun of them and compare them to middle and elemtary school students, but hey. I've always wanted to know how to write english well, so I'll really study this website and try to teach myself it as well as I can. Maybe my memorizing or something. Whatever way I do it my goal is the same. http://www.dailygrammar.com/archive.shtml It was written by some awsome english teacher who retired after like 20 or so years. Gotta love the teachers, I have a lot of respect for them. If my posts on this blogger end up more interesting and better, that's a goal I'd like. It's too bad I didn't learn as much as I wanted to when I was younger. I was too busy being a gamer- which I don't mind - but I could have learned a lot. I guess my time starts now. I'm starting to feel like the SAT's will roll by and I'll just fail them like, beyond horrible. If only I paid more attention when I was younger... That's where the real seperation begins between kids and most of my friends are on the smarter side of it while I'm somewhere on my own. April 7th already, wow. I'm going to start studying for the SAT's now before they murder me later. Karl Marx's last words, "Go on, get out. Last words are for fools who haven't said enough." Say what you want before you die and you won't regret it.

Ramblings

The beginning of a new month, April. Next month I turn 17 and I don't have my license. It's embarassing sometimes but it's not really a necessity for me. I hope a lot of fun is coming up for us all in the next few months. I've got so much homework thanks to that gay suspension and just can't do it all. It's too hard to concentrate and work over here because everything is a distraction. Maybe I should start going to the library more to study on my own and read good books. I have the internet, thank God, for all of the information anyone may want. I like to go to websites like Wikipedia where I can read up on things that I've always wanted to know. I like considering myself an autodidact, I guess it makes me feel more special or better about myself. Although I'm not really a great example. I don't go home and read books or listen to music or anything like that. For me, it's different. I just read stuff that I want to know about instead of reading novels. I would like to read novels and be like that but, there's no routine or motivation strong enough. Laziness is really dumb, I hate that because it's hard to change over and work. I've totally given up in classes like Latin, I do absolutely nothing because I know nothing. I can't seem to have the structures and rules in my head when translating or whatever we're doing. It's easy to say you're going to want to do something until you get home and you have to test yourself to do it. I like working, I do work in other classes, errands, around the house. There is my workout routine which is great for me but after that, there's nothing. As soon as I enter the home the computer is used. From there it's just playing games or doing some small amount of homework. My problem could be with the games or the computer itself, it keeps me from working. I just remembered how the SAT's are coming up, and quick. I really need to start studying on this even though I don't want to. It's stupid how America just tests kids their whole life over and over. Public schooling is dumb, politicians think if you keep putting money in there the problem is solved. Why is it private schools spend half as much and graduate more students? These are all facts I've given before. I'll try to keep away from the computer after school and see how that affects my work. It's late and I have school for this week and then a vacation next week, awsome. Here's another quote to leave you with, "You can't ever teach anyone anything, you can only help them find it within themselves."

The other side

Boo. I don't know what to say about April 1st. I've been out of the school this whole week so going back to it on this day is like a joke. I shouldn't be going to school! I've been talking about death and things with Kevin and things are really weird. All these good friends you've known through high school die in car accidents like "electricbaby", some girl I knew in Diablo 2. I played with her a lot and we were good friends and then for a week or two she wasn't online. Her brother came on one day and told me how she died in a car accident. I was shocked, and didn't believe it until her brother never logged her name again. It's so sad, good people are the ones that don't deserve it but get it. The good die young is true no matter how many times you hear it. I guess babies who die are the truly good. You could say that a good life isn't how long you lived but how you lived your life. For some that means do all the drugs they can get their hands on and have as much sex as possible, but why? They think that's a good life to live? Well, it's the average American stereotypic view on how to live life. But think about it, why not religion? That should immediatly make drugs a joke because life on this planet is so short. It's not about doing as much bad stuff as you can, but doing as much good since your in heaven for an eternity. What would you pick: 100 years of drugs and parties or an eternity of happiness? What do you get out of the drugs and parties in the end? It's sad but that's how people live, there's no point. I've got my way and hope you find yours. I actually have school for the first time in a long time today so I have to sleep.