Realization

What isn't there to talk about? Let me start by saying again that the note was a bad idea. Semso's calling me a stalker and saying she's scared of me? That scares me. I don't ever want to scare someone like that, it doesn't make sense. So I guess it's done for, no problem. It's a good thing I read a few things before that changed my idea's on love. Some people say, if I can't have you I won't be able to live. Sure... Some others kill themselves too after seeing they can't have someone, that's dumb. There's no good reason to kill yourself --probably besdies Euthanasia which I don't know what to say about. There really isn't, you've been given the greatest gift and take it for granted. So, enough of that, I'll move on. I just don't want her to be scared at all, my intentions are for good not stupid stuff like scaring people. I'll still feel it once in a while yeah, but I've got no regrets and that's important to me, I guess. There's so many other people in the world, even if you think there isn't. It's Really hard to imagine 6 billion people lined up, that's true, but that's how many people there are! So look at the world from a different and larger point of view, there's so much to do.

This weekend was really fun, besides the fact that I got suspended. Thursday night Wathen and I drove around and did nothing really, that was ok since I got to drive his car up my street. Friday I went to Semso's, we rented NBA Street V3 and it was boring all day since he didn't want to go anywhere, plus that game sucks. I played it for the first time today and beat his ass in it. So on saturday we went to the NY International Auto Show, now that was awsome. Being around so many exotic, foreign, concept, and new factory cars was amazing since it was my first time going to any show like that. The cars there were nothing short of awsome. Lamborghini, Ferrari, Saleen, Audi, Mercedes-Benz, BMW, Ford, Nissan, and whatever else was there. My muscles ached from standing up for so long plus, we worked out the day before and my back had it the worst. Then from there we just walked around and sooner or later headed home. That was like 10 and got home at 12. Then we watched Hostage, pretty crazy film. The whole storyline was good and what got me had to be the scary stoner/goth kid who's death was a "movie" ending. It's something that I could have created, the goth comes up behind this guy throws a molotov cocktail at some cop, he dies. Then the goth walks in the room with Bruce Willis, this girl, and the girls brother. He throws a cocktail into some corner then loses his energy when trying to throw one at the girl but instead drops to his knees. He has a little flirt scene with the girl where love overcomes him. He couldn't throw the Molotov at her, instead he drops it on the floor(Which sucks because the alcohol goes on his body and he's soon in flames). That's the scene that's going to stick to me from the movie. Because that's the kind of scene that I could make, I really think that there is an ability in me to be a writer of movies. My dreams are so vivid and beautiful, and that's what I like. The freedom of dreaming within myself, it could be about anything and still be fun. Well, it's almost 2 AM and don't know what to do. I've been sitting, thinking, and writing since 12:44. Maybe I should go to sleep and study in the morning.

"Don't ever be afraid to tell someone how you feel because if you are then you could miss out on the greatest thing in your life." If only... That's not for me to decide. The quote means something, I've taken most of my advice and thank others for making mistakes so that I didn't have to but learned from it as well. Whenever I go back to Europe, I know my oppurtunity awaits. You know sometimes I try to fit a quote here that can change someone's life, something written so beautfully and perfectly. The more I try the more I realize there isn't one that powerful, just a realization or end result. Just like major events don't occur without a series of minor events. You understand? I hope so. I'll try to add them anyways. G'Night.